Posts tagged purity

We need more Tim Tebows



EDITOR’S NOTE: Earlier this week, Stepping Up’s Jeff Kemp was guest contributor on Fox News Opinions, standing up for the “controversial” Tim Tebow. The controversy, of course, is that he doesn’t do things the world’s way. Considering the way the culture seems to be headed, that’s probably a good thing. Jeff brings out that the world could stand to benefit from Tebow’s values. (To read the entire op-ed, go to the article Bravo Tim Tebow.

we need more tim tebowsThe Internet is abuzz with the news that Heisman Trophy-winner-turned-broadcaster Tim Tebow was allegedly dumped by former Miss Universe Olivia Culpo because he refused to break his vow to remain a virgin until marriage.

Whether or not this is true, what is indisputable is that the response to the “news,” particularly from sports media, has been disgraceful.

Rather than applauding Tebow for taking a moral stand and backing it up by his actions, the media made snarky quips to mock the former quarterback. I could list a host of mean comments thrown his way, but I’d rather not give any more attention to his detractors.

. . .

That’s why Tebow’s public stand is so important—because it encourages others who are on the same path. And the truth is, we need more Tim Tebows.

Sexual abstinence outside of marriage isn’t always easy, but it pays dividends. For individuals who practice it, saving sex for marriage can deepen one’s relationship with God and increase trust with a future spouse. It also protects the individual from the potential negative consequences of sex outside of marriage—from STDs to unplanned pregnancies to a higher level of regret at the end of a relationship.

But it isn’t just the individual who can be hurt by promiscuity. Our nation pays a high price for sex outside of marriage.

According to Pew Research, 34 percent of children in the United States live in single parent families. That number is a whopping 67 percent for black children according to the Kids Count research from the Annie E. Casey Foundation.

Research has shown time and time again that single-parent families are more likely to be poor than are two-parent families. Children from single-parent homes are less likely to complete college, more likely to live in poverty as adults and more likely to face a teen pregnancy. And these are the lucky kids. After all, of the more than 1 million abortions that took place last year, it is estimated that 75 percent were performed on single women.

. . .

And so we come back to Tim Tebow, a young man who has decided that he will wait until marriage to have sex, regardless of what it may cost him in broken relationships and public mocking.

He won’t be contributing to the rise of unplanned pregnancies, the spread of sexually transmitted diseases and the abortion epidemic. Instead, he will continue to live his life to please God and treat others well. That’s a good thing, right? Something worth applauding, right?

For those members of the media who have knocked him, I want to ask one question: would you prefer your daughter date a promiscuous “player” or a Tebow?

Our daily temptation



I think we would be shocked if we could count the number of times we are tempted each day.

Our culture has become so sexualized over the past few decades that it’s easy to become hardened by the number of images and temptations that bombard us each day. Walk through a supermarket and you see suggestive photos on the covers of magazines … turn on the television and it doesn’t take long before you see advertisements for sexy lingerie and erectile dysfunction … go online, and you find unwanted e-mails or ads offering x-rated images with just one click. It’s a daily temptation.

I think we would be shocked if we could count the number of times we are tempted each day. Sometimes life feels like a continual stream of choices: Will I trust God for the power to turn from that daily temptation, or will I dwell on it just a bit? Will I take a second look? Will I click on that tempting link … just this one time?

I am reminded of a story that FamilyLife President Dennis Rainey tells in his devotional book, Moments With You:

I was seated in a car with another Christian leader — a good friend of mine. We were both away from home, without our wives, waiting for a colleague who had just gone inside a store. And as we sat there, a woman walked by who was, well, drop-dead gorgeous. I caught sight of her as she entered the store, and then turned back to our conversation.

When she walked by again, by God’s grace (or the fear of my own reputation being spoiled), I summoned up enough self-control to look away. But I did notice my friend’s eyes lingering as she walked on to her car. Knowing we were both fighting the same battle, I casually said, “Hey, you can look at her once, you can look at her twice, but if you look at her that long …”

We laughed. We knew.

Guys, there’s nothing wrong with appreciating a woman’s beauty. But we all know in an instant when we’ve reached that point where we’re no longer simply noticing her but have begun enjoying her and letting our minds become a playground of lustful thoughts.

As Dennis writes, it’s often not the first look that gets you — it’s the second, and third, and fourth. If you dwell on that daily temptation, you begin playing with powerful forces. As James 1:14-15 tells us, “But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.”

These words run contrary to the spirit of our modern age, which tells us that biblical boundaries for sex are prudish and outdated. Our culture encourages us to embrace and experiment with sexuality to help “discover who you are.” And then it avoids taking responsibility for how uncontrolled lust can ravage lives, marriages, and families.

Whenever FamilyLife Today airs programs on pornography, for example, we receive a number of heart-breaking e-mails about people giving in to temptation and getting caught in a trap from which they couldn’t break free. Here are just two examples:

At the age of 13, I started my first job. That day I took my first puff of a cigarette and was exposed to pornography for the first time. I had no idea of the power that was to take control of my life as a result of that action. For the next 25 years I battled with pornography. My sin did not stop with pornography but took [other forms]. No matter how hard I tried, I could not make real changes. I could not escape it.

It’s not just men whose lives are hijacked by the effect of porn.

My dad had pornographic literature in the house that I found as a young girl. It distorted my view of male-female relationships. I began to see sex as a way to get love. I led an extremely active sexual lifestyle and eventually started working as an exotic dancer. I’ve been following the Lord for 11 years now, and am married to a wonderful man. But the ghost of pornography still haunts me. Fantasies still plague my mind and interfere with what should be pure love for my husband. I can see the connection now between how I feel and what you said. I am praying for God to cleanse me of the effects of pornography.

Letters like these echo the warning of James 1:14-15 and show us that giving in to temptation is far more dangerous than many people realize. One of the most critical commitments you can make to your marriage is to stay clean. You can’t avoid daily temptation. But you can control your response.

Choose to turn away. And ask God for the power to continue turning away every day.

Copyright © by FamilyLife. All rights reserved.

Subscribe via Email

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.