Posts tagged engaging with your family

How to make the family meal the norm



This is the final post of two about how to combat electronic isolation and bring the family together by making the dinner table a priority. “Capturing the elusive family meal” made the case for how pivotal the meal can be in strengthening family relationships. This post gives you suggestions on how to ease into family meals without a lot of hassle.

Mind your manners

The social graces used to be a part of everyone’s education. Today many children have no clue about proper table etiquette or why it even matters. In our house the dinner table is Manners 101. Occasionally we get objections, especially from the older children, about how the rules are old fashioned or too restrictive. That’s often a great opportunity to remind them that manners are not so much about rules as they are about showing consideration for others.

From time to time, though, I’m the one who needs the reminder that manners aren’t just about rules. Sometimes in my desire to teach my children good behavior, I’ve found myself so overbearing in my correction that the atmosphere at the meal becomes unpleasant. What is supposed to be an enjoyable time can become anything but. These interactions at the dinner table give everyone, even us adults, a chance to grow and show grace.

The dinner table is an opportunity to remind each person that he or she is a valued member of the family, and that the actions of one person can affect everyone in the family. It assures children that they belong to a group of people who genuinely care for them.

Setting your family table
Recent family fun at our dinner table.

Recent family fun at our dinner table.

After nearly 30 years of gathering daily for meals, Ellie and I are convinced that we’ve truly benefited by making the family table a priority. Maybe you agree in principle, but you can’t see how you will ever get past all the obstacles to make the family meal a regular part of your schedule. Maybe you feel you don’t have time to do the cooking. Maybe dinner is the worst time of the day when it comes to family schedules. Maybe having meals together is such a foreign idea you don’t know where to start.

Here are a few tips that may set you on your way to making your dining room one of the most special rooms in the house.

Enlist the family’s help. Kids can help shop, prepare the food, set the table, serve the drinks and food, and clean up after the meal. In our home, we have assigned responsibilities that rotate every week. Dads, you need to make it a priority to come home from work on time.

Set reasonable goals. If you’re not eating together at all, start off with one or two simple meals, then gradually increase the number of meals and how elaborate they are. Set a goal for the number of meals you want to eat each week as a family and require everyone to be there. Children, especially the older ones, may resist at first. After a while, though, children actually become the greatest advocates for spending time around the dinner table.

Minimize your time in the kitchen. If you’re spending hours preparing and cleaning up for a 15-minute meal, chances are you’ll give up on family meals before very long. Enlist all your servants like the microwave, crock-pot, and pressure cooker. When you fix meals, prepare double or triple portions, then freeze or refrigerate for later meals.

To focus on each other, you need to ban the electronics. Turn off the television and computer, and don’t answer the phone.

Focus on being together rather than creating a full course meal. If you have to, serve heat-and-eat foods and just add a pre-mixed salad for health and to dress up the meal. You can bet that King Solomon saw his share of elaborate feasts, yet he declared, “Better a dish of vegetables where love is than a fattened ox served with hatred” (Proverbs 15:17).

Create some memorable meals. Every once in a while, you might want to make it really special. A fancy meal is a great way to focus on manners, and a special treat for the girls. It helps emphasize the holy nature of family gatherings. Candles, flowers, and the nice tableware add a special touch.

Make the family table an outreach for friends. If your children are of dating/courting age, it’s a good opportunity to get to know their special friends, a girlfriend or boyfriend. It also lets that person better understand your child within the context of his or her family, as they see the interaction with their siblings and parents.

Think of discussion topics ahead of time. A verse of Scripture, the latest news, a new joke. I recently got each family member to jot down their favorite color, flower, food, etc. on a piece of paper. I collected them and read them aloud while everyone tried to guess the family member.

Find ways to make it positive. Reward a child’s good behavior with an extra serving of dessert or the privilege of planning an upcoming menu.

However you choose to organize your family meals, make them a special part of who you are as a family. You can bet that in years to come, your children will look back at those daily times as some of the most influential moments in their lives. Who knows? In a generation, they may be sitting down with their children, creating special moments of their own.

© FamilyLife. All rights reserved.

STEPSeek - 10-point checklistYou just finished reading “How to make the family meal the norm” on the Stepping Up men’s blog. Don’t forget part 1.

STEPThink - 10-point checklistAs leader of your home, what will you do to help your family connect in this digital and individualistic age? 

STEPEmbrace - 10-point checklistJust Add Family is a fun resource from FamilyLife designed to connect family members and build memories.

STEPPass - 10-point checklistShare these articles with a friend. If you have encouraging insights on family meals, share them with us.

Capturing the elusive family meal



Does it seem like meaningful daily interaction in your family is getting more and more rare? Busy schedules and personal electronics tend to do that.

The other day, I was lamenting how much scarcer our family time has gotten in recent years. Then I remembered an article I had written a decade earlier about the importance of family time, and especially the family dinner table. When I found it and re-read it, it seemed so timely and helpful, so I’ve decided to revive it here on Stepping Up in two posts. The first makes the case for making the effort. The second will give some tips for making family time at the dinner table the new norm around your house.

Recently, one of our teenage children invited a friend over for dinner. For us it was a typical meal around the dinner table. For him, it was a unique experience. He told us that both his parents work long hours, and his family of four only eats together for special occasions like Thanksgiving and Christmas. He didn’t seem to mind squeezing in to an already crowded table of eight. In fact, he remarked more than once how great it was.

My wife, Ellie, and I both grew up in families where mealtime was family time, so early in our marriage we decided to continue the tradition. With only two of our seven children still living at home, it has become more difficult than ever to keep family meals a priority. But we know it’s worth the effort, especially in this age of frenetic schedules. Esteemed universities and scholarly journals agree—study after study shows the nutritional, social, emotional, and spiritual benefits of the family dinner table. For example, children who eat regularly with their family:

  • have fewer behavior problems in school and are significantly less likely to get involved with drugs, alcohol, and early sexual behavior;
  • are significantly more likely to have a healthy balanced diet and less likely to be overweight;
  • are likely to have higher test scores relative to the amount of time spent with family;
  • have higher communication skills and greater vocabulary;
  • teenage girls are particularly less likely to suffer from depression or attempt suicide, and less prone to develop eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia.

Unfortunately, few families are enjoying this important part of life. Recent research suggests that between 10 and 40 percent of children never or seldom eat together with their family. On average a family shares only 3-5 meals together a week, and even that average drops considerably as children become teens.

Living in the real world

50s Dinner TableThe cohesive family unit of 50 years ago is fast becoming ancient history. Today, each family member is more individualistic and isolated from the others in the family. Dad (and often, Mom) goes off to work and spends at least eight hours with other adults. Children spend the large portion of the day in class and most of the interactions they do have are strictly with those their own age.

The dinner table offers the opportunity to bring adults, teens, and younger children together to share their individual experiences of the day. It becomes the place where life issues are raised, discussed, and resolved. Rather than each family member continuing to drift into his or her own individual world, the interaction during mealtime strengthens family bonds and enriches the daily experience of life.

Throughout Scripture, when the word table is used, it often connotes more than just the piece of furniture where the food is served. It is often a place of special honor, acceptance, care, and fellowship. The cup and bread that we share in remembrance of Christ’s sacrifice for us, we often refer to as the Lord’s Table. In Psalm 23:5, King David declares to God, “You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.” We see numerous passages where close associates of a king are referred to as those who ate at his table (2 Samuel 9:11; 1 Kings 18:19; Luke 22:27-30).

In the book of Deuteronomy, God commands parents to teach their children throughout the routine activities of the day (6:4-7; 11:18-20). Children learn best not in the school classroom, but in the classroom of life. At the Williams dinner table, often someone will bring up a current event topic and others will chime in with their perspectives. While the conversation is usually between the teens and adults, our younger children take it all in and learn things that wouldn’t have otherwise entered their minds.

A wise parent not only monitors the conversation at the table but looks for ways to direct it. Often seeing how siblings act and react toward each other at the table can be a cue to parents to teach the importance of honor, acceptance, and graciousness. Sharing wisdom that comes from a verse of Scripture or from a life experience becomes a natural part of the conversation as we face new experiences or address issues that are hampering family unity. With all family members there at one time, we as parents have a captive audience for revealing that God is still guiding us in our own maturing process.

Read the second post, “How to make the family meal the norm,” which will give you some tips on how to ease into family meals without a lot of hassle.

© FamilyLife. All rights reserved.

STEPSeek - 10-point checklistYou just finished reading “Capturing the elusive family meal” on the Stepping Up men’s blog. Don’t forget part 2.

STEPThink - 10-point checklistAs leader of your home, what will you do to help your family connect in this digital  and individualistic age? 

STEPEmbrace - 10-point checklistAlso consider connecting in the car with “10 Ideas for Non-Digital Family Fun on Road Trips.” 

STEPPass - 10-point checklistSit down with your wife to figure out how you can build a strong family table without putting extra pressure on her.

How are you rubbing against time?



rubbing against time - it's just rainIt’s been raining off and on here for the last several days. Yesterday when I got home from work I had to run back out to the store so I took my two boys with me. We parked and I took my four-year-old’s hand to go inside. He pulled me all across the parking lot row we were on so he could walk through every puddle. He got his shoes, socks, and feet soaking wet. And was happy as he could be.

When we got home, I wanted to go for a run even though I knew there was a good chance of getting rained on. My nine year old wanted to ride his bike with me so we struck out for the jogging trail by our house. He proceeds to ride his bike through every puddle on the paved trail and through every mud hole he could find on the side of the trail. Starting from the back of his head going all the way down to the heels of his shoes he was covered in either water or mud. And now he too was happy as he could be.

As dinner was cooking, the two of them were on the trampoline and the rains came down and began to flood the earth. It was a downpour. I stepped onto our deck to see the boys completely soaked, jumping up and down, grinning ear to ear, and between his screams of joy I heard my four-year-old say to his brother, “This is awesome!”

I started to wonder what’s happened to us men and our childlike joy of jumping in puddles, riding through mud, and playing in the rain? At what point did we start becoming averse to such things instead of looking forward to them? When did we start looking at the weather and then concern ourselves with packing an umbrella? Or when did we decide not to do something like go for a hike or go watch a game because we were afraid it might rain? Better yet, when was the last time it started raining and you grabbed your kids and spent 30 minutes playing in it with them?

One of my favorite authors is Donald Miller. While I don’t agree with all his theology, I love his writing style and he often throws out some good, thought-provoking comments. In one of his books he writes, “A man’s senses are either sharpened or dulled by the way he rubs against time.” How are you rubbing against time these days? Are you being dulled by long hours of work? Are you dulling yourself by always being on your phone checking email, scores, or Pinterest? (If you answered yes to Pinterest you need intervention. Immediately.) Not only are you dulling yourself, you’re dulling your relationships with those around you. Perhaps it’s time for you to change your work-life and phone habits. And  in place of those, reclaim that boyhood, carefree, “enjoy the little things in life” attitude. You’ll be amazed at how much freedom and fun there is when you do this. I promise you’ll love it and so will your kids!

 

STEPSeek - 10-point checklistYou just finished reading the Stepping Up blog post, How are you rubbing against time?

For a jump start on how to engage with your children, read 10 Ideas: Creating Quality Time with Your Kids.

STEPembrace

What do you plan to do to put aside your activities and ask your kids what they want you to do with them?

STEPpassShare one of these two articles with your wife or a fellow father. Help each other to be more involved in your children’s world.

Boomer or Murphy: Whose side are you on?



Boomer or Murphy

I don’t like to run around and jump on bandwagons, but you probably saw the embarrassing stink that ESPN commentator Boomer Esiason caused when he railed against New York Mets outfielder Daniel Murphy. Murphy’s offense? Compromising his devotion to his team by missing two games to be with his wife for the birth of their first child. According to Esiason, Murphy should have insisted his wife schedule a C-section before the season started.

Public reaction was swift and strong about the imbalance between sports and family, but not against Murphy. Fans lowered the boom on Boomer, who also happens to be a family man (he’s been married to his wife Cheryl since 1986, and is a passionate dad).  To his credit, Boomer quickly and earnestly apologized, particularly for unnecessarily thrusting this couple’s life into the limelight.

Boomer’s not the only one in sports, media, entertainment, or business who would strongly criticize someone for not putting their professional duties and organizational duties first, particularly if you’re paid huge millions.

But Murphy’s decision reflects a change he has undergone in the past couple of years. His world used to revolve around baseball and himself. He poured everything into “being the man” in his sport, but two injury-plagued seasons brought him personal struggles that caused him to re-evaluate his identity and priorities. At that point, he recommitted his life to Christ and vowed not to let baseball define him.

Acting like Boomer or Murphy?

It’s  easy to criticize Boomer’s blatant disregard of the priority of being with your wife at the birth of your first (or any) child. You just don’t miss such a big event. But what about all the small things we do as husbands and fathers that elevate  our jobs over our family?

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve failed to show up on time when I told my wife Stacy I’d be home for dinner, or just generally failed to show consideration for the one person who  gives so much for me. The lowlight was when I came back from a celebrity ski race  just long enough to drop off my laundry with Stacy and leave for a  boxing match in Las Vegas. Not my best chapter as a husband.

On my wedding day, if you showed me a list of the ways I would put Stacy and my boys in second place behind my work or hobbies, I probably would have been as critical of myself as you probably were of Boomer Esiason for his extreme position. It’s easy to let the pressures of life swallow up the best resolutions made as a new husband or father.

I fully understand the pressures that an intense job in a tight economy can inflict on the types of family choices a guy makes. Athletes feel it particularly intensely because they have teammates depending on them, coaches breathing down their necks, the critical gaze of fans, and a big contract that could disappear with an injury or release.

Sometimes the conflicts between work and home are unavoidable. When I was with the Seahawks, I remember a great tight end (who was also a great husband and father) joining the team mid-season. The week he arrived, we flew with the team for a  game against San Diego. We got phone calls from the airport that his wife was in labor. My wife was the only person she knew in town, so Stacy went with her to the hospital and was her coach in labor—what he would have been doing if he was there. The day-and-a-half road trip was just long enough to keep him from away from his wife as she gave birth in a brand new city 3,000 miles from home back east.

He hated it, but between the move, travel for the game and the timing of the labor, it was unavoidable. Daniel Murphy, though, was just exercising the right to a standard three-day league-guaranteed leave early in the season, when the stakes aren’t so high.

Bringing it home

Half the kids in America are growing up without the benefit of both parents at home, and there are so many challenges today to keeping marriage commitments front and center. It’s all the more important in this age to set an example and speak up to support the responsibility a man has, to be there for his family, even though some would say that’s shirking work responsibility.

So whether it’s  something big like keeping your travel schedule clear so you can be with your wife when she goes into labor, or something routine like making family dinner time a priority, you have the opportunity to model priorities for your co-workers and your family.  Take confidence knowing that your Father in Heaven blesses your decisions when you’re doing what He’s called you to do as a husband and father.

How about you? Have you had to make tough decisions to put your family ahead of your work?  Are there things you need to do that communicate to your family that they are the priority in your life?  I’d love to hear your story.

You are the most interesting man in their world



This blog post first appeared in the Noah Gets a Nail Gun.

You’ve seen the commercials for the most interesting man in the world – he starts the morning saving endangered alpine birds, followed by a dominant performance at the international polo competition in Dagestan, then wraps up the evening mending flaws in the theory of relativity over a cup of an exotic beverage he brewed the night before from seal scrotums, polar bear teeth and arctic ice. Quite a list of accomplishments for any one lifetime, yet just an average day when you are … the most interesting man in the world.

If the characterization wasn’t so over the top, I’d find my man card status threatened by the mere existence of such a person. But you don’t have to drink Dos Ickies to be found interesting. You don’t even have to be the most interesting man in the world. A much more attainable goal is to become The Most Interesting Dad to Your Kids. How do you do this? Start with pursuing things you find interesting.

Robert Lewis, author and founder of Men’s Fraternity, talks about the importance of a man having something to look forward to everyday. A man needs productive interests in his life, things that make him a better man. Too many guys in their 30s, when work gets hot and heavy and the kids get smelly and sticky, give up all the activities that they found fun and interesting in their 20s. They pour their lives into their jobs, come limping home to try to make it through one more night. Just barely enduring the kids, hopefully not checking out too long or blowing up too often, they fall into bed in yard-work clothes with one thigh hanging off the mattress, too exhausted to shower away the grass clippings. All merely to wake up and repeat the cycle again tomorrow. What joy. And by the time the weekend comes along, little league and dance parties consume any remaining energy. The only rest seen in a given week is their ritual seven minutes on the office toilet. Even that gets interrupted by the guy in the next stall calling his mom to wish her a happy birthday.

But as Robert Lewis said, it is important to do something with your life that is interesting, even if only to you, something that gives you energy and makes you look forward to the next day. Even if you think you don’t have the time. You must come to believe that it really is worth the time. Why? For you own sanity, for the sanity of your wife and kids, for opportunities to sharpen and be sharpened by other men.

FlyFishingFor your own sanity

Before we had kids, I did a fair amount of fly fishing. At the time, I had a friend who said two very important things to me, he said “I’ve explained to my wife that fly-fishing is cheaper and more entertaining than counseling.” Meaning, if he didn’t have some outlet he would probably go insane. He also said, “And if I ever get bored of fishing, I can just stop and fiddle with my gear.” Meaning, half of the fun of the sport for him is acquiring and learning how to use the gear. There was an artistry and cathartic aspect to just getting ready to fly fish that was interesting in and of itself. The tying of the flies, the practicing of the cast, the community and friendships that developed, all of this gave him joy. He didn’t have to be on the river to be enjoying the sport. But more than anything, he understood that he needed this outlet to keep from going crazy. He had to have something like this in his life to keep him healthy.

I’ve seen a number of guys lately who are able to sustain the maddening pace of work/kids with no other outlets for a few years, mostly because the allure of their job keeps them going, but once they reach the pinnacle or plateau of their career, they look back down the hill and think “I shaved my face for this?” They’ve not fostered any part of their personal life and have thus become very un-interesting to almost everyone, including themselves.

Proverbs 20:5 says “The purpose in a man’s heart is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out.” It’s interesting that we still know very little about the deepest parts of the ocean. We’ve been x thousands of miles away to the moon and explored the outer limits of the solar system, but can’t go seven miles down into the water. The pressure is so intense at that depth that if you were to inadvertently pluck a nose hair, your brains might shoot through the exposed follicle. Actually, people can’t even go to those depths, only unmanned vehicles.

But no worries, because this verse isn’t referring to the ocean (and none of us are that deep anyway), as an ancient Hebrew person couldn’t afford a full SCUBA system. And without oxygen and neoprene, it’s hard to get deeper than a dozen feet.

The Hebrew word for “draw it out” refers to the act of getting water out of a well, of drawing up a bucket. And it comes from a word describing, “lowness as a state or goal.” Remember the cartoons where the well bucket would drop and send the rope spinning, causing the crank handle to do a Mike Tyson on some pour soul’s face? The bucket drops in a hurry. In fact, the natural state of the bucket is lowness – is to settle in to the bottom of the well and stay there. But when you’re low – whether you meant to get there or not, you’ve got to draw it up. When tempted to vegetate, you’ve got to pull up the bucket!

I know a guy who hates his job. I mean HATES it. I felt sorry for him for the first year or so, but now I don’t want to hear about it any more. I don’t ever ask him about it. Because if he still hates his job, it’s his own fault. Only he can make that change. He has to find something interesting. But that’s no easy task. In fact, it’s one of the hardest things a man can do. It takes intentional hard work to get to the heart of a man. But a man of understanding, or, for our purposes, an “interesting” man, will draw it out.

For the sanity of your family

When I was a kid, my dad often amazed me. He seemed to be the strongest, fastest, smartest person I had ever met. There was nothing he seemingly couldn’t do.

What makes a leader?



In creating the Stepping Up men’s video series, FamilyLife interviewed men in the New Orleans French Quarter, asking the following question:

“What makes a leader?”
YouTube Preview Image

Some of the guys in the video were on target with their answers, others were a bit off. Below, we’ve pulled some quotes, not from just any guy on the street, but from some men who have been intentional about their leadership.

. . .

“If you look in Ephesians, Chapter 5, and you look at the list of qualifications, really, for a husband — you look at this picture of what it means to be a Christ-like leader — basically, to lead a wife as Christ leads the church. You find that the picture is not just about a guy who pounds his chest and says, ‘Me man; you woman — me speak; you do.’ He’s to lead in love. He’s to lead in the Word. He’s to lead in righteousness. He’s to lead in selflessness, and he is to lead in intimacy.

“Most guys don’t understand servant-leadership from that perspective. So, it’s very important that when we talk about the way a husband is supposed to lead, we don’t just take the culture’s definition of leadership and superimpose that on the Scriptures. We have to get into the Word of God to determine what biblical leadership in the home looks like; and then look for an individual who understands that, as opposed to just the cultural norm.”

– Voddie Baucham, from “Discovering Biblical Leadership,”  FamilyLife Today® radio broadcast

“The statue is of William Leftwich. It is a statue of a man, with one arm pointed to his left — his rifle is in that arm — his body is clearly running in the direction of his outstretched rifle. His right arm is crooked; and it is beckoning those who, although unseen, are behind him. His head is pointed back at them. You can tell he’s yelling something. Below that statue, it says simply, ‘Follow me!’

“And that, I think, is a phenomenal picture of leadership. It is: ‘If you want to know where to go, watch me. Follow me because I will be doing what I ask you to do, and I will be leading the way toward a mission that is worthy of being accomplished.’ This man, ultimately, died in Viet Nam because he went on every rescue mission for the Reconnaissance Marines that he sent out. One day, on the rescue mission of the men he commanded, his helicopter was shot down and he died. He was doing exactly what he asked his men to do. When he said, “’Follow me!’ they listened.”

– Donovan Campbell, author of The Leader’s Code, from “Characteristics of a Leader,” FamilyLife Today radio broadcast

“Two words — serve and lead — may seem like a contradiction, but they are inseparable according to Scripture. While the Apostle Paul tells us in Ephesians 5:23 that ‘the husband is the head of the wife,’ he quickly puts to rest any notions that this leadership allows any form of selfish male dominance. He completes the sentence with ‘as Christ also is the head of the church.’ Then the passage goes on to say that husbands should love their wives ‘just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her’ (verse 25).

“This paints a picture of leadership that is contrary to how the world views it. A man is called to be a servant-leader — to take responsibility for his wife and children and to put their needs ahead of his own. He is called to demonstrate selfless, sacrificial love — the type of love we see in God toward his children.”

– Dennis Rainey, “5 Ways Men Need to Step Up”

He’s been gone for years



We talk about how important marriage and family is, but where are we directing our emotional energy each day?

He was a well-respected executive in his community. He had climbed the ladder of success and was reaping the rewards.

Except in his family.

He arrived home from work one day and shocked his wife by telling her he wanted a divorce so he could marry another woman. This couple had two sons in grade school, and the mother worried how they would react to the news. But when she told them that their father was leaving them, she was surprised by her oldest boy’s reply: “Mom, he’s been gone for years.”

Gone for years.

I think that’s one of the saddest quotes I’ve ever heard. It echoes through countless homes in America today, where a husband or wife, a dad or mom, may be physically present but emotionally absent. We talk about how important marriage and family is, but where are we directing our emotional energy each day?

I’ve been thinking about this lately because I’ve entered a season in my career where I have more to do than I can ever remember — more writing, more editing, more projects, more planning, more managing, more responsibility. I love all these opportunities that God has given me, but I’m also realizing how much of my emotional energy is used up during the work hours.

When I leave my home in the morning and begin driving to work, my mind shifts into a different mode of operation — like an idle computer that is suddenly activated. Throughout the day, my mind is racing as I move from one task to another. I’m meeting with people … doing research … planning future articles for the FamilyLife website … trying to put words together for a column like this. I often need exercise at lunch time just to keep my mind clear.

And when I return home each evening, what do I want? On most days I’ve used up so much emotional energy that all I care about is shutting down that computer in my mind. I want to lie on the couch and read magazines or books. I want to watch White Collar or Person of Interest on television, or relax with one of my favorite old movies on DVD. Let’s see … should I escape to the Old West and enjoy Jimmy Stewart and John Wayne squaring off with Lee Marvin in “The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance” or should I watch Gene Kelly in “Singin’ in the Rain”?

There’s only one tiny problem with this scenario: Life doesn’t revolve around me. Philippians 2:3-8 calls me to put my wife’s needs above my own. When I use up too much emotional energy at work, and waste too much time with entertainment, other priorities are neglected.

My wife, Merry, would probably say I’m being too hard on myself. My daughters are grown now, but I’m confident they wouldn’t use words like, “He’s been gone for years” when they describe me as a father. But in my heart, I know how easy it is for me to detach emotionally for a few hours or even a few days.

Here are a couple of things I need to do:

  • Spend more time alone with God, talking with Him and reading His Word. I find when I am consistent in spending time with God, I have more emotional energy throughout the day.
  • Be more proactive in spending quality time with Merry. I need to talk with her more, and I need to get out and have fun with her more.

I wish I was writing with wisdom gained from years of doing it right. But I’m still in the battle, and I have a feeling many of you are as well.

Copyright © FamilyLife. All rights reserved. This post originally appeared in Marriage Memo.

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