Posts in category Being a man

Carson Palmer’s highlight reel



This weekend, Carson Palmer will lead his Arizona Cardinals against the Carolina Panthers for the right to represent the NFC in the 50th Super Bowl. It’s an unfulfilled dream of his 12-year NFL career.

“I don’t want to be done, watching football on Sundays, and saying I never got a chance to play in the Super Bowl,” Palmer said in a 2014 interview with USA Today. “That lingers, heavily. Not that that’s going to make me the man that I am or the father or the husband. That’s not going to define me. But I want to experience that. I want to experience a run — a chance where you just get hot and you hit the playoffs and you make one of those runs, those magical (runs). However long it lasts, I want to be able to experience that.”

Palmer has had one of those runs, one of those hot streaks during the 2015 season, despite ending the previous year rehabbing a re-torn ACL. So in a way, this season is already reaching a goal. But it’s not the ultimate goal.

In the middle of that quote from the 2014 USA Today interview, you can see that football is not at the center of who Carson Palmer is as a man. That is made even more clear in a current Dove Men+Care commercial making the rounds on TV and the Internet. Consider it Carson Palmer’s real highlight reel.

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“As a professional quarterback, there’s so much pressure and so much on your shoulders. When you come home, you just get to be dad and shut it off. I go to work as a football player, but I was put on this earth to be a father.

highlight reelThat final quote from the commercial makes it pretty clear that football is not at the center of his life. Actually, though, neither is his family. In an 2011 interview with Sports Spectrum, he revealed that his faith in Christ is at the core of his identity as a good man, husband, and father. He also talked about the influence of strong Christian mentors, like former longtime QB Jon Kitna.

Truth is, Palmer is not the only quarterback who claims Christ to lead his team to the NFL playoff’s this year. In fact, of the 12 teams that made it, at least half were led to the playoffs by those who profess Christ. Some may have a stronger testimony than others, but here are some of the notable ones:

And it’s not just the quarterbacks who are emerging as believers and good men. Many high-profile players are speaking out about their faith and their families. It’s great to see Dove and other companies holding these men up as examples through a highlight reel of what really matters in their lives. Hopefully during the playoffs and Super Bowl, we’ll see more great commercials like the one featuring Carson Palmer.

We need more Tim Tebows



EDITOR’S NOTE: Earlier this week, Stepping Up’s Jeff Kemp was guest contributor on Fox News Opinions, standing up for the “controversial” Tim Tebow. The controversy, of course, is that he doesn’t do things the world’s way. Considering the way the culture seems to be headed, that’s probably a good thing. Jeff brings out that the world could stand to benefit from Tebow’s values. (To read the entire op-ed, go to the article Bravo Tim Tebow.

we need more tim tebowsThe Internet is abuzz with the news that Heisman Trophy-winner-turned-broadcaster Tim Tebow was allegedly dumped by former Miss Universe Olivia Culpo because he refused to break his vow to remain a virgin until marriage.

Whether or not this is true, what is indisputable is that the response to the “news,” particularly from sports media, has been disgraceful.

Rather than applauding Tebow for taking a moral stand and backing it up by his actions, the media made snarky quips to mock the former quarterback. I could list a host of mean comments thrown his way, but I’d rather not give any more attention to his detractors.

. . .

That’s why Tebow’s public stand is so important—because it encourages others who are on the same path. And the truth is, we need more Tim Tebows.

Sexual abstinence outside of marriage isn’t always easy, but it pays dividends. For individuals who practice it, saving sex for marriage can deepen one’s relationship with God and increase trust with a future spouse. It also protects the individual from the potential negative consequences of sex outside of marriage—from STDs to unplanned pregnancies to a higher level of regret at the end of a relationship.

But it isn’t just the individual who can be hurt by promiscuity. Our nation pays a high price for sex outside of marriage.

According to Pew Research, 34 percent of children in the United States live in single parent families. That number is a whopping 67 percent for black children according to the Kids Count research from the Annie E. Casey Foundation.

Research has shown time and time again that single-parent families are more likely to be poor than are two-parent families. Children from single-parent homes are less likely to complete college, more likely to live in poverty as adults and more likely to face a teen pregnancy. And these are the lucky kids. After all, of the more than 1 million abortions that took place last year, it is estimated that 75 percent were performed on single women.

. . .

And so we come back to Tim Tebow, a young man who has decided that he will wait until marriage to have sex, regardless of what it may cost him in broken relationships and public mocking.

He won’t be contributing to the rise of unplanned pregnancies, the spread of sexually transmitted diseases and the abortion epidemic. Instead, he will continue to live his life to please God and treat others well. That’s a good thing, right? Something worth applauding, right?

For those members of the media who have knocked him, I want to ask one question: would you prefer your daughter date a promiscuous “player” or a Tebow?

When does a boy become a man?



As part of the Stepping Up video series, we asked people passing by on the street different questions around the topic of manhood.  In this clip, we asked them, “When do you think a boy becomes a man?” There were some interesting responses; many had difficulty answering the question.

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So, when does a boy become a man?  The Apostle Paul gives us a hint:

When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. (1 Corinthians 13:11, English Standard Version)

It’s interesting that this verse follows a very famous passage of Scripture, oft-quoted at weddings … the “love chapter” of 1 Corinthians 13.  I have been at many marriage ceremonies where this passage was read but never one where they read this verse (which follows directly after the “love is” verses).  Maybe if more marriage ceremonies included this verse there might be more attention drawn to becoming a man and turning away from childish things.

We don’t do “rite of passage” ceremonies very well in our culture.  Typically it’s assumed that by passing certain age milestones, or some of the major events in our lives, we “automagically” move into manhood.  Yet, as one woman said on the video (and correctly so), “There are some who are men at 15 and others who are still children at 40.”

Helping your boy become a man

If you are wanting to know how to help your son become a man, there are some good resources available to help you. FamilyLife has the Passport2Purity resource that allows you to have a discussion with your son about significant issues he’ll face as an adolescent that will move him to manhood.  Here are some other resources for you to check out:

If you are aware of any others that are biblically based and have made an impact on you or someone you know, share them here.

© 2015 by FamilyLife. All rights reserved.

STEPSeek - 10-point checklist

You just read the post “When does a boy become a man?” on the Stepping Up men’s blog by FamilyLife

STEPThink - 10-point checklistSo when does a boy become a man? Is there a specific time when YOU consciously put away childish things?

STEPEmbrace - 10-point checklistMen help men grow up. Read Dave Boehi’s article, “Men Who Won’t Grow Up,” on FamilyLife.com. 

STEPPass - 10-point checklistSeriously consider organizing a Stepping Up 10-week study so together you can grow as men in godliness.

What it means to ‘act like men’



1 Corinthians 16:13-14 is a passage that’s always intrigued me. If ever there was a passage designed specifically for guys, this would have to be it.

“Be watchful. Stand firm in the faith. Act like men. Be strong. Let all that you do be done in love.”

 What more could a guy ask for? Two verses. Straight to the point. Five very short, direct commands.

Recently, I had been digging into the passage, trying to plumb the depth of truth in those two verses in the original language. I thought it would be quick, but there’s so much there, I ended up having to put it aside for when I had more uninterrupted study time.

Before I could get back to it, wouldn’t you know it, FamilyLife Today had a radio broadcast on that very passage. If you’ve ever seen the Stepping Up video series, you may remember James MacDonald giving a quick, to-the-point, teaching session on this passage. If you haven’t seen it, here it is.

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On the FamilyLife Today broadcast, however, he dives deeper as he talks to a group of men at his home church in Chicago, Harvest Bible Chapel. I’ve excerpted a few pieces here to whet your appetite so you’ll listen to both days of the broadcast.

We have to act like men, and the first part of that is to “be watchful.” It’s the idea of—in old times, there were these ancient cities that were surrounded by walls. The men had the responsibility to keep the barbarians out. In the fortified city, the people (in this instance: your wife, your children, your family) could only rest because they knew that the watchman was awake and was on the wall.

It’s time for us to quit being so passive, and step up—as we’re being challenged today—and do something! God help us to be watchful over our homes! 

Act like a man! Hang up the phone, get off the couch, shut off your computers, stop tinkering in the garage; and act like a man! Your son needs you / your daughter needs you. So be watchful.

Then, this—it means: “Be strong.” Actually, the Greek here is a passive voice, which means, actually—this is very instructive—it means: “Be strengthened.” This is not an exhortation to be the world’s strongest man: “How much can you bench press? How big are your biceps and your shoulders?” This is not an exhortation to be macho; alright? This means: “Be strengthened in your inner man/ in your soul,”—listen—“in your character, in your integrity, in your fidelity to the truth.”

Of course, in Scripture, Christ is our strength. This isn’t an exhortation to try harder. Do you hear me? This is not an exhortation to try harder! “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. [Philippians 4:13]” Jesus Christ is the strength to live the Christian life! It’s not like He stands over there—“Thank You for saving me. Now watch me go live an awesome life for You,”—alright? “As you received the Lord, so walk in Him…[Colossians 2:6]” Christ is the way to salvation / Christ is the strength to live the Christian life.

So “Act like men,” means be strengthened. Keep that relationship strong. The best way I know to be strong is to admit your weakness. Admit your weakness. Paul said, “When I am weak, then I am strong.”  [2 Corinthians 12:10]

Check out the rest of the two-day broadcast on this passage. Then go out and 

Act like men.

© 2015 by FamilyLife. All rights reserved.

STEPSeek - 10-point checklistYou just finished reading the post, “What it means to ‘act like men'” on the Stepping Up blog for guys. 

STEPThink - 10-point checklistWrite the passage down and put it in a prominent place at home or work, then commit it to memory.

STEPEmbrace - 10-point checklistTo go even deeper, read James MacDonald’s book, Act Like Men: 40 Days to Biblical Manhood.    

STEPPass - 10-point checklistGet with a group of other men to go through the 10-week video study, Stepping Up: A Call to Courageous Manhood. 

Do something great



Do something greatTwo weeks ago I joined “Tarzan” for a bike ride. His real name is Kurt Searvogel, and he is attempting to set a new world record for the most miles ridden on a bike in a year. The current record extends back to 1939, when Tommy Goodwin rode 75,065 to beat the previous record by almost 10,000 miles. In order to beat Tommy’s record, Kurt has to average 206 miles a day, every day, for an entire year. That’s riding a bike for 12-13 hours a day, every day. Ouch. So far he’s on track to beat the record, with just a couple of months to go. You can track his daily updates on his Facebook page.

So I joined him for 20 miles of the 205 miles he did that day. He lives just down the street from me, and I wanted to join him because of what an inspiration he’s been to me lately.

A couple of weeks ago, I awoke one morning feeling particularly slugish, apathetic, pathetic, pitiful, lazy, and uninterested in even lifting my head from the pillow. It was the first chilly day of the year and I just wanted to stay in bed all day.

Then it hit me.

Tarzan got out of bed that morning and he got on his bike. It didn’t matter if he wanted to or not. It didn’t matter that it was cold. It didn’t matter that it was a seemingly impossible task. He did it. He got on the bike and he started peddling. Because he wants to do something great – to set a world record.

Now, you may think he’s crazy – that it’s a silly thing or meaningless thing to pursue. And maybe you’re right. Maybe there are better ways he could spend his time. At this point, he might even agree with you. But here’s the phrase that kept coming to my mind that day:

“DO SOMETHING GREAT.”

Do something great. Get on that bike – metaphoricaly – and do something. Knock something of importance out of the park. And that was a huge encouragement to get the day going and do something of significance. It’s easy to get overwhlemed by the big questions of life – am I significant – does my life count – does it matter. But the only way that question gets answered is by getting on the bike and pedaling. It’s the accumulation of each pedal stroke that answers the question.

As men, you have an awesome opportunity to do something great. What will it be?

This post originally appeared in the Noah Gets a Nail Gun blog. © 2015. All rights reserved.

“Shut up legs!”



JensVoigtAs a young boy in Germany, Jens Voight was a math prodigy who once put “Attack!” in every blank space on one of his math tests. It would be the wrong answer for everyone else but Jens got away with it. Hmmm. Perhaps he’s actually the World’s Most Interesting Man? This is how Jens has faced any situation he has had to fight through … Attack. This served him well as a professional bicycle racer. Although he never stood atop the podium in Champ-Elysees at the end of the Tour de France, he did wear the yellow jersey on two occasions. What he is probably most famous for is the phrase, “ Shut up legs!”

It was during an interview with a Danish TV station during the Tour de France when they asked him how he keeps going when his legs are burning and he’s worn out. He said, “I simply tell my legs to shut up and do what I’m telling you to do.”

There’s a spiritual parallel we can pull from that statement. There are times in our lives where we simply need to say “shut up” to whatever is distracting us and continue on with what we need to be doing. It’s especially a good phrase to use with our enemy, Satan. As blogger, Morgan Synder says, “I am staggered by the level of naïveté that most people live with regarding evil. They don’t take it seriously. They don’t live as though the Story has a Villain. Not the devil prancing about in red tights, carrying a pitchfork, but the incarnation of the very worst of every enemy you’ve met in every other story. Life is very confusing if you do not take into account that there is a Villain. You, my friend, have an Enemy.”

This Enemy of ours is out to destroy us. And destroy us by any means. He does not play fair or follow any rules other than doing anything to bring you – and your wife and kids – down. He’ll plant thoughts in your mind that are evil, lustful, and vengeful. He’ll tell you things that are untrue like, “You’re no good.” “You deserve to be punished for the sins you’ve done.” “You’re stupid and that’s why you never get promoted.” “You will never measure up.” This is just a very short list of things he’ll whisper in our ears. This is where we need to simply tell him to “Shut up!” These kinds of thoughts are against God’s plan for your life. Capture these thoughts when they come into your head, tell the Enemy he can shove it and then replace the lies with the Truth from God’s Word.

We also need to be on alert for our wife and kids. The Enemy will use the same tactics of using lies to destroy them as he does to us. The messages he sends will be different for each person but the plan of attack will be the same. He’ll tell your wife she isn’t pretty, she’s not doing a good job with the kids, or she isn’t as successful as other women. He’ll tell your kids they’re stupid because someone got a better grade or can read better than they can, that they aren’t talented because they were picked last for playground kickball or didn’t make the team, or he could go the other direction and fill them with pride, whispering how great they are, which also leads down an unhealthy path. We need to train our children to understand and be aware of the tactics of Satan, identify when he’s coming after them, and learn to fight off the attacks as they come into their minds.

As with a lot of things, if you want to win, you need a good offense in addition to a good defense. One of the best ways to be defensive against the Enemy is to be on the offensive. Stay in the Word, be connected with other believers, form a group of allies to battle with, and don’t entertain the thoughts Satan whispers in your ear. Know the truth about who you are, know what God desires of you and when your mind starts to play tricks on you with lies and temptations, be ready with a “Shut up, Satan!”

As a side note, when we are attacked and continue to give in to the temptation — whether it’s lust, alcohol, drugs, whatever — when we keep listening to and acting on the lies, it becomes a stronghold. With a stronghold, it will take more than just a simple “Shut Up” to gain victory. This is where it’s important to have allies in battle with you to fight with and for you.

STEPSeek - 10-point checklistYou just finished reading Todd Nagel’s post, “Shut up legs!”  on the Stepping Up blog for men.

STEPThink - 10-point checklist“Is Prayer Your First Response” when facing trials and temptations. Learn how to make it a regular discipline.

STEPEmbrace - 10-point checklistHelp your children develop spiritual discipline by teaching them with “A List of Scriptures from the Proverbs.” 

STEPPass - 10-point checklistA band of brothers can help you succeed in the day-to-day. Consider leading a group of men through Stepping Up.

Finding Noah



Holt Condren was 37 years old when he felt God calling him to a unique quest. It wasn’t just a quest that was different than anything he’d ever done. It was a quest that has captivated men for millenia.

He wanted to join in the expedition to find the remains of Noah’s Ark.

Holt had never climbed a large mountain, much less one like 17,000-foot Mount Ararat. He knew almost nothing about previous expeditions. He just knew that God was calling him. In fact, he didn’t even know that a group of guys had been actively searching for the Ark every year since the 1980s.

FindingNoahTeamMen like Dr. Randall Price, senior archaeologist and Director of the Center for Judaic Studies at Liberty University. He’s been on these expeditions since 2009.  Men like Bill and Will Hughes, a father-son team who take care of the mechanical needs. Men like John Bryant, an expert in geophysical modeling, brought in to operate and interpret data from ground-penetrating radar (GPR) equipment being hauled up the mountain. Men like lead mountaineer Kevin DeVries, who has already conquered the highest peaks on five continents. There are also men like expedition planner Steve Rudd, geologist Don Patton, architect Bruce Hall, and one of the founders of the modern Noah’s Ark search, Dick Bright, who has personally made over 30 expeditions.

The documentary, Finding Noah, follows the 2013 quest of Holt and his fellow Ark hunters as they use state-of-the-art methods and technology and old-fashioned perseverance to finally lay hold of physical evidence from a story not just in the Bible, but part of almost every culture across the world. With each successive exploration, information has led them nearer and nearer to what they believe to be the exact resting place of Noah’s Ark (or at least some of it). This time, they are operating with hopefulness like never before, and the documentary reveals to the public the results of their search and the sacrifices they made in the process—life-threatening weather, politically-unstable surroundings, treacherous landscapes and oxygen-starved altitudes.

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Finding Noah is a one-day event in hundreds of theaters in virtually every state on Friday, October 8. The film website directs you on how to find a showing near you or to buy tickets.

A quest for adventure isn’t the only thing these men have in common. Each has been driven individually by his faith in the veracity of God’s word that the Ark isn’t just a fable. They believe that finding the remains will be perhaps the greatest historical find in the history of the world, and will have huge ramifications in the realms of science, faith and elsewhere.

“I think there’s so much evidence that it’s irresponsible not to look,” says Patton.

“The past five years has really been a mirror into my soul. Why am I doing this year after year? Why am I risking life and limb to look for something that we have no conclusive evidence actually exists?,” asks DeVries.

These men are also driven by a mission bigger than themselves, and the fellowship of other men drawn to that same goal. In the process, they are learning the limits of themselves and the need to rely on other men to keep them going when the last bit of their own strength and resolve is virtually gone. It requires faith in your co-laborers, as well as faith in your calling in the midst of fear, Condren says.

“Without faith, it’s impossible to please God. It takes courage to exercise faith. In my own life, I almost see fear is a trail marker for life direction. What am I scared to do here in this moment? Faith is moving toward it. Sometimes it’s a small thing. But those are also courageous things.

“If you want to walk this ambitious life that God created you for, what does it look [like] to move, [to] take a step toward your fear — being courageous one step at a time — then watch God knock down the walls and give you opportunities like He’s given me to go and search for Noah’s Ark.  There’s no telling what God will do in your life if you’ll be courageous in the little things.”

© 2015 by FamilyLife. All rights reserved.

You’re a tool



I was visiting a friend’s church recently. A short way into the sermon, the pastor stepped from behind his lectern, leaned toward the congregation and said to the individual members, “You’re a tool.”

He meant it as a compliment.

Typically today, if someone says that to you, you wouldn’t take it positively. They might even be fighting words. It implies that you’re a pawn; a stooge. It’s meant to say that you’re being used by someone for their own particular purposes.

But is that necessarily negative?

Tools are actually pretty handy whenever we have to build stuff or fix things. And specific tools are important. Ever tried doing a repair project without the right set of tools? If you’re anything like me, you ended up busting your knuckles, losing your temper, and wasting your time.

No, tools are actually good things. Let’s look at three things about tools and why you need to be one.

PegboardTools1. Tools are designed to be used. The pegboards in my garage are hung with lots of different tools: a couple of rakes, multiple kinds of screwdrivers, a plumber’s snake, a tape measure, a torque wrench, a leaf blower, and electrician’s pliers. Probably 99 percent of the time each tool just hangs there, serving no purpose at all. It’s only when I pick it up for a task that it takes on value.

Your life is the same way. You could just lay around, taking up oxygen, taking in food and drink, and taking up space. It’s not that you don’t have value. But it’s not until you are giving yourself toward a specific purpose that you prove what your value really is. God has created each of us men, not just to exist, but to be useful.

2. Tools are designed for a specific purpose. No two kinds of tools are the same, even when they’re simple tools. Ever look at the different kinds of hammers that exist? When all we need is a quick repair, the kind of hammer is not that important, but for special projects it makes all the difference. And that’s how the hammer’s differing features developed. You wouldn’t pick up a tack hammer to put on a new roof, or use a sledge hammer to reupholster a chair.

Some tools are cool, some are pretty bland. A high-powered, variable-speed cordless drill is cool. A drywall screw, not so much. But each has its value in the same job. When an ice storm took out our backyard privacy fence several years ago, I was so grateful to have the drill to make the big project go faster. Now, years later, my cordless drill is beat up and falling apart and the batteries are losing their usefulness. But the screws are right where I put them, perfectly holding up a very strong fence. Which one is the more useful now?

Knowing what kind of tool you are is important, and so is accepting what kind of tool you’re not. As a father, I’ve seen seven little babies grow and develop, watching in awe as their unique skills, talents, and attributes reveal themselves. Would I hold one child less valuable than another because of their design? What good father would?

One of the most difficult things I’ve faced as a father is seeing my children diminish their design. Maybe my daughter feels she’s not as pretty as the cool girl, or my son realizes he’s not as athletic as the popular guy. It’s been my job to remind my son that he has artistic talent that most could only dream about, or my daughter that she has the ability to light up any room with her personality.

Our children often feel that because someone else’s gift is more valued in their peer group, they need to change their design in an attempt to be valuable. Predictably when they’ve done this, they wither because they can’t compete on that level, and because they’re not developing the talent God gave them. Eventually, as they accept the way they’re made, they find satisfaction and fulfillment in becoming who they were meant to be. That’s the same with all of us.

My friend John started his career as a mechanical engineer. Sitting behind a desk all day started to wear away at him, though, and he looked for a way to get exercise. He decided to take up dance in his spare time. Not only did he enjoy it, but he became quite good, and eventually left his engineering job to join the Spokane Ballet. In discovering his design, he was also acknowledging his designer, and soon wanted to find a way to give his talent back to God. He later became one of the founding members of Ballet Magnificat!, which dances as a means of telling Christ’s redemption story to those who would otherwise not give any attention to spiritual things. Oh, and on the side, he’s also the tour bus mechanic.

3. Tools point to a designer. As we saw before, a hammer is not just a hammer by chance. Its design is intentional, each feature with a view toward a specific intention and purpose. You are chosen by God and are a powerful tool in his hands.

The Apostle Paul was a tool. Early on, when he was going throughout Israel persecuting Christians, he was a tool of the Pharisees. He thought he was serving God, when in fact he was opposing Him. But after God got Paul’s attention by striking him blind on the road to Damascus, he became a tool in the hands of the Master Designer. In fact, when God spoke in a vision to Christian leader Ananias (who Paul was probably intending to persecute), He said of Paul, “he is a chosen instrument of mine to carry my name before the Gentiles and kings and the children of Israel.” (Acts 9:15 ESV)

That New Testament Greek word for instrument can also be translated vessel, implement, utensil, gear, tackle … or tool. When speaking metaphorically of a person, it can mean a chosen man of quality, or it can be something like an evil minion. Paul traded one life for the other.

In writing to the Ephesian Christians, Paul uses a different word to convey the same meaning.

“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” (Ephesians 2:10 ESV)

The word literally means poem, masterpiece, or craftsmanship. Except, in this case, the emphasis is not on the tool, but on its designer. That word is only used one other time in the Bible, by Paul. He chose it to make the point that the heathens see the workmanship of God throughout creation, yet choose to worship the created thing rather than the craftsman.

As God’s tools, we tend to focus on what we are rather than Who created us and for what purpose. We may think that if we don’t take control of our life and do things our own way we will never amount to much as men, never realize our full potential. After all, why would we want to spend an entire life being someone else’s tool?

But what if the person who wants to utilize you is completely honorable? What if He is righteous, all-knowing, all-powerful? And what if He knew your design and purpose better than you do yourself? Would you, as His creation, be satisfied with his good design? Would He, as your creator, be worth offering yourself to use in every good thing as His tool? His instrument? His craftsmanship?

As Christian men, we need to remember that our lives are not our own. We may try to reimagine our design for another purpose, but the One who thought it up and created it always knows better. When we are tools in His hands, not only will He get the glory, but we will realize the satisfaction of finally achieving the very thing that we were created to do.

Remember, you’re a tool. Put yourself in the hands of the Master Designer and Craftsman, and be what you were meant to be.

© 2015 by FamilyLife. All rights reserved.

STEPSeek - 10-point checklistYou just finished reading the post by Scott Williams, “You’re a tool” on the Stepping Up blog for men.

STEPThink - 10-point checklistHave you thought of yourself as a tool in the hands of a master craftsman? What might God want to do through you?

STEPEmbrace - 10-point checklistDetroit Lions chaplain Dave Wilson discusses authentic manhood in the hands of the Master Craftsman.

STEPPass - 10-point checklistBill Bennett, author of The Book of Man, tells how guide your children in today’s world to be their best.

Men are back, at least for today



Men are back in vogue.

At least they are today on the 11th anniversary of the September 11 attack.

Fourteen years ago, a lot of everyday guys became instant heroes. They didn’t set off that day to be heroes, they just responded with courage in the flash of a moment on a day that was anything but everyday.

Some of those guys, like the first responders in New York City, were trained to do heroic things. They thought of their actions that day as nothing more than just doing their jobs. Other men were military personnel, but not the heroic kind on the front lines of battle. These were guys who had desk jobs, whose heroism was thrust on them when the Pentagon came under siege. Other guys were just businessmen who were flying as part of their job, until their job became confronting the face of evil in the skies over Pennsylvania.

In every instance, each man stepped up by putting aside his fear and personal safety for the well-being of those around him.

Wall Street Journal columnist Peggy Noonan wrote about these men in a column a few days after the 9/11 attacks. It wasn’t specific men she was writing about, but the innate character of men that may hide itself in times of safety, but shows itself the most heroic in the face of catastrophe.

You didn’t have to be a fireman to be one of the manly men of Sept. 11. Those businessmen on flight 93, which was supposed to hit Washington, the businessmen who didn’t live by their hands or their backs but who found out what was happening to their country, said goodbye to the people they loved, snapped the cell phone shut and said, “Let’s roll.” Those were tough men, the ones who forced that plane down in Pennsylvania. They were tough, brave guys.

It’s easy to venerate these guys when you see what they did on September 11, 2001. But would we have felt the same way about them on September 10? No, we probably wouldn’t have even noticed them. Even the firefighters.

One segment of the Stepping Up video series features these members of the New York Fire Department. Just looking at these guys on the video and hearing them talk, there doesn’t seem to be anything special about them.

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“When we talk about heroes—and that’s typically always discussed—I don’t think that anyone who is currently working that was down at 9/11 in any capacity views themselves in that light.  The heroes are the ones that didn’t actually come home; we were just doing our job.”

Truth is, though, there was no difference between the ones who came home and the ones who didn’t. Both groups showed courage. Both stepped up. Both were heroes, it’s just easier to recognize it in the ones whose heroism took the form of the ultimate sacrifice.

It doesn’t take a 9/11 to be a hero or even to do courageous things. It’s only the circumstances that bring it out. These firefighters probably showed the same courage on the 10th and 12th as they did on 9/11. And there are other men around the country that we will never know about who showed just as much courage on those days. “Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important,” said Ambrose Redmoon.

So whether your actions earn you the title of hero or whether they’re never even noticed at all, do the things that a man does: stand for righteousness, live for others, and keep the big picture in focus. Remember that today’s everyday man is often tomorrow’s hero.

© 2015 by FamilyLife. All rights reserved.

STEPSeek - 10-point checklistYou just finished reading the post “Men are back, at least for today” on the Stepping Up blog for men.

STEPThink - 10-point checklistFor Brian and Mel Birdwell, the heroics began after the 9/11 attack on the Pentagon. Listen to the broadcasts.

STEPEmbrace - 10-point checklistOne of Dennis Rainey’s favorite things to ask men is “What is the most courageous thing you’ve ever done?”

STEPPass - 10-point checklistGrab a group of guys to explore together the Stepping Up video series and what makes up courageous manhood.

True leadership to aspire to



Jeff Kemp with 49ers Coach Bill Walsh

Jeff Kemp with 49ers Coach Bill Walsh

On Saturday nights before NFL games, most teams watch a bit of film of their opponent to sharpen their minds for the next day. My 49ers coach, Bill Walsh, added a twist: he showed a highlight clip of our team the game before that week, so long as we won or competed admirably. On a big run by the running back, Bill would narrate the play, giving special emphasis to a key block.

“Gentlemen, look at our left guard Guy McIntyre. Watch his footwork and his speed pulling across the formation to lay out, with his head on the correct side of that linebacker that he blocks. This is perfection. It’s a great effort by a great San Francisco 49er. I look forward to seeing you men play at this level tomorrow.”

Man! How do you think Guy felt after that? How did we as buddies feel? How much would you want to be the guy to make the plays that made the highlight film the next week?

Bill had a way of lifting our view of ourselves from average to elite, from athlete to intellectual, from winner to champion. This is the kind of true leadership I aspire to, and so can you.

To husbands, dads, managers, and Little League coaches: make a mental highlight reel; describe the character, the effort, the kindness, or the sacrifice of someone on your team. You can help someone face their blitz, reach their heart, and fill their tank.

©2015. Adapted from Facing Your Blitz weekly video encouragement, and from the book, Facing the Blitz, by Jeff Kemp.

STEPSeek - 10-point checklistYou just finished reading “True leadership to aspire to” by Jeff Kemp on the Stepping Up blog for men.

STEPThink - 10-point checklistGet these devotional encouragements weekly in video format from Jeff Kemp’s Facing Your Blitz Youtube page.

STEPEmbrace - 10-point checklistFor more encouragement on turning trials into triumphs, get Jeff’s book, Facing the Blitz, from the FamilyLife online store.

STEPPass - 10-point checklistEvery day this week, text, email or speak to your your wife, child or friend about a thing they’ve done well.

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