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My anniversary epic fail

It’s me, the guy who told all of you guys how to plan special anniversary celebrations, because they are important to our wives. I still believe that, too. And I planned a great, week-long trip to celebrate my 14th anniversary with my bride. I had it all set up: great, romantic destination, pre-planned tourist stops, lots of beautiful scenery. It was dee-luxe all the way. I was the man with the plan.

Until we returned to our cottage after a romantic dinner and she gave me my anniversary card. She had a look on her face that said, “Okay. Where’s my card?” Time stood still, the crickets chirped and my life passed before my eyes. I had done almost everything. Almost. I did not buy an anniversary card for my bride. I had nothing to give her in return for her card to me. She looked at me with so much disappointment.

Anniversary epic fail.

Next, I did the unmanly thing. I got defensive with my wife, making a list of all the things I did do for her. I had planned our trip, the sights, the meals, and I had opened the car door for her every time we got in the car. Then, she reminded me that I hadn’t given her a card on Valentine’s Day, either. I figured the cruise we took for Valentines Day made up the card. What is it with the cards?

Actually, given time to get out of my defensive mode and listen to my bride, I had a moment of enlightenment. It’s not about the cards; it’s the sentiment. I should have realized that immediately. It’s about the words on the card I picked out and about the personal words that I added. I have worked at many Weekend to Remember marriage getaways, and the number one comment we receive in our feedback is that people totally love the project that requires each spouse to write a love letter to the other.

When we speak love to our wives through notes, cards, and love letters, we are following in the footsteps of the man who, when asked by God, “Of everything in the world, what would you like to have?” answered that he would like to have wisdom. That was Solomon, and he used many words of love to woo his beloved in the Song of Solomon. Such as, “How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes are doves.” Nice, eh?

Trust me, I will never forget the value of an anniversary card, Valentines Day card, Mothers Day card or even Groundhog Day card. Honestly it’s not even about a $5 card. In fact, next time I am simply going to write her a note, fold it in half and put it in envelope. Knowing my wife, it will be worth way more than $5. It will be priceless.

How about you? Are you ready to step up and recognize your wife’s need for affirmation, love and emotional security?

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3 Comments

  1. Ed's Gravatar Ed
    October 21, 2013    

    Thanks for clearing that up for me. I never really understood the meaning behind the whole card thing, until now.

  2. Darryl's Gravatar Darryl
    October 26, 2013    

    Point well taken. I really never realized just how important cards are or what they might actually mean to the one I love.

  3. Scott Williams's Gravatar Scott Williams
    October 28, 2013    

    I guess I never saw it so clearly because (by the grace and mercy of God) I haven’t yet forgotten the card. I think us guys tend to see the card as the icing on the cake of all our extravagant plans. But to our wives, maybe the card IS the cake.

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